Logan * *

Got a dumb twelve year old boy, whose education is primarily made up of comic books and computer games? Take him to see this, he’ll love it!

You do manicures here?

You can justify it too because “critics” who know a lot more than me say it's really good. They even think it’s intelligent.  They’re impressed by the symbolism, or topical issues (racism and migration), or the reference to old classic films or something.  Yeah I noticed that stuff too.  It was so obvious a donkey would notice it - or some dumb kid stuffing his face with popcorn (alright maybe not him so much).

It’s about a man whose body mutates.  He becomes super strong, grows claws, and then he does stuff which he wishes he hadn't, even though he only cuts up bad people. It’s like he’s cursed with this awful strength. What an original idea hey?.

He’s based on a highly derivative comic book character.  He has to look after a young girl who has the same ability.  Gee I wonder where she got that from?  Then, surprise surprise, the “plot” tells us where she got it from. You’ll never guess.

Anyway, I found watching this  quite moving. In fact the whole audience did. I saw it on a huge screen at a new cinema where everyone gets a lean back chair with footrest (not just those in the Lux Lounge).  We moved our chairs the whole time - chair goes up, chair goes down, chair goes up, chair goes down.  The kids with the 10kg buckets of popcorn did it because, well that's what you do.  I did it because I was trying to pass the time, sitting through a movie I should not have bothered with.  (Now who’s the dumb one?)